Found Photographs: Off-Brand Celebrities

15 May

I used to live in a neigbourhood that was very friendly towards garbage pickers like myself.  Year round, but especially in the summer, people would put discarded things on their front lawns, encouraging passerby to find treasure in their trash, which I often did.  One day I found among such a pile a few Polaroids, each of a woman wearing very distinctive red glasses standing next to people who seemed more attractive and charismatic than the average person, but not as striking as a Hollywood star, leading me to guess that they were likely Canadian celebrities, the people equivalent of  “off-brand” products, the “Lime it Up” counterpart to “7 Up”, if you will.  See for yourself what I’m talking about, and bonus point for anyone who can tell me who these people are:

Unknown celebrity, left, patriotic Canadian fan, right.

And check out the guy’s outfit, he’s wearing a tie, and possibly suspenders with a collarless shirt.  Where’s a celebrity stylist when you need one?  Not here, evidently; no stylists please, we’re Canadian.

Look how starstruck the fan on the left is!

The woman who’s pictures these are looks so happy in all of them.  It makes you wonder why she decided to get rid of them.  Was it her waning interest in the stars she’s pictured with?  Has she grown out of her celebrity obsession? When I first got these pictures several years ago I laughed at her clothes and giant 80s glasses, but now enough time has passed that she’s back in style in an ironic hipster way, especially in this last one:

The cyclical nature of fashion

Look at her; The long hair parted in the middle, the black silk screened t-shirt, and the jean jacket she’s wearing,  all totally hip now.  Even those giant, unflattering glasses are the type of things you see on so many hipster girls today who are trying for this whole cliche  “awkward girl with huge glasses and baggy worn out guy’s clothes who’s actually gorgeous but just doesn’t know it* because she’s so busy being artistic” thing.

* she knows it and spends a lot of time cultivating this “I’m so over it” look

This type of clothing and glasses are exactly what you see at Urban Outfitters (a very trendy store) these days, all pre-ripped and faded for your convenience.

Who would have known all those years ago that the one in these discarded pictures who would have a lasting impression would be the girl with the glasses, and not the fame seeking actors and or musicians she’s standing next to?

UPDATE:

While going through some old photos I discovered one more Polaroid from this series, the only one that shows the lady with the red glasses with a celebrity i think I recognize:

Is that who I think it is?

Now, correct me if I’m wrong here, but is that not a young Eddie Cibrian?  A man most known for inexplicably leaving the mother of his children for for stupid-face Leann Rimes?  I think it is!  This actor’s only redeeming quality is his appearance in the hilarious movie “But I’m a Cheerleader”, which starred an adorable Natasha Lyonne and featured a non drag RuPaul Charles.

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